It’s pride month in the UK and we are ready to celebrate with all the LGBTQ+ families, flying the rainbow flag and spreading love, peace and harmony to all. Today we share our Q&A with LGBTQ+ Dad’s about all things parenting, sleep deprivation and bringing up two daughters.
Have you ever felt any stigma attached to being two daddies?
NO. It is easy to fall into the trap of believing that other parents look at you in a different or critical way, but our experience tells us that all parents have their own busy and complicated lives to manage and aren’t too worried about other people’s.
However, this may not be the case in all parts of the UK or the rest of the world. We live in a cosmopolitan city where anything goes!!
How do you share the parenting role?
Try and keep things equal and share the good and the bad jobs. Know each others strong and weak points and divide up the jobs based on what you are each good at.
What are your top tips on juggling parenting life?
Communicate really well with your partner and don’t store up a grudge!
Be really organised. Don’t do too much but do enough not to get bored.
Don’t worry about what other parents are doing. IF your kids are happy and developing, then you’re doing something right!
Just enjoy every stage of your children’s lives as they grow up so fast. Don’t be embarrassed to ask for help and use family to support you.
What has been the most challenging baby stage?
Probably the first 3 months until they start to sleep longer than 4 hours in a row. Even then, they are so portable and easily pleased that it isn’t too hard as long as you can cope with the interrupted sleep!
What are the best sleep tips you have learnt?
Routine, routine and routine. Don’t be nervous about letting a baby cry within reason. If a child is fed, dry and well then crying is just something that babies do as they know no other way of communicating. I sometimes think that men find it easier to let a baby cry….it must be an evolutionary thing!!
Get it while you can!!!! Don’t become obsessed with sleep and take it in turn with your partner.
Best strategies to manage feeding toddlers?
Wear old clothes.
Take it one meal at a time.
Don’t spend too much time preparing complicated meals and you will only be upset if they don’t eat it!!
Toddlers only need small amounts of food so don’t get too worried if they don’t eat that much!
Read to them whilst they eat or any other way of engaging them or keeping them happy. We avoid screens at meal times.
What have been your best and worst parenting moments?
Exploding nappies on a plane that has just landed and trying to force your way against the passengers trying to disembark on a plane to get to the loo.
Having your daughter point to a man in the gym/swimming pool changing room and saying that “His willy is just like yours”!!!
Reading stories at night and just cuddling up.
Overhearing your daughters explain with confidence and maturity beyond their years that they “Don’t have a Mum and that they have 2 Dads”.